My Generation

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If you are a non-cyclist you may be dimly aware that it has been a tad chilly of late.  If, like me, you are desperately trying to get fit and loose some turkey ready for a fairly major cycling challenge in a few weeks time you will know exactly how chuffing cold it has been.  In sheer desperation I have had to set up the turbo trainer.  This instrument of torture allows the bike to be attached to a friction roller and mine is a fairly high-end model with a connection to the computer which allows my pedalling to propel me through a video of a real cycle ride, with the friction on the roller being adjusted to simulate the hills.  It is a clever bit of kit and completely captures the experience of cycling.....oh yes, apart from all the bits that actually make cycling enjoyable.  The ONLY redeeming feature of a turbo trainer is that it allows one to cycle in the warm.

The computer link displays a range of statistics such as speed, distance covered, cadence and calories burned, though each of these numbers is disappointingly lower than I am aiming for :-(.  Another, even more depressing, read-out shows how much power I am generating.  On average it is a measly 125 watts - just over what a full-strength light bulb requires.  If I really go at it, and only for very short periods, I can double this but 250 watts still isn't going to get Sizewell B too worried.  I would require 7 similarly weedy mates just to boil a kettle! 

'Am I more pathetic than other men' I wondered.  On many counts probably yes but on this specific topic ........definitely YES!!!!  It seems that a strong amateur cycle racer can generate a sustained 200+ watts for an hour while professional riders can double this.   Top track sprinters can, very briefly, churn out 2000 watts.  Bugger!

The only other thing generated on a turbo trainer is sweat which, without the passing flow of air, just pours out.  Here I think I can safely hold my own with the Tour Pro's.  If cycling performance was measured in litres of sweat then I think I might be in with a chance of a stage win!

PS Good song title eh?  I did consider David Watts but felt this was better!

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