Grumpy Old Men On Bikes

Yesterday morning Dom assured me we were going to have a nice quiet day.  It was to be our longest and hilliest thus far so my hopes weren't high.   Breakfast went smoothly and by 8:30 I was shopping for breakfast supplies when the phone rang.  A rider had managed to crash on a slippery bridge and, as well picking up some grazes and bruises, she managed to damage the electric gears on her 3 week old bike.  3 hours later, with the help of YouTube, I managed to get everything working well enough to get he back on the road but I was then seriously behind the curve.  The rest of the day past in a blur of tearing back and forth on US101 to give the weakest riders a boost in the van over the worst couple of hills. I arrived at the hotel hot, tired and just a tad grumpy.  The hotel looked pretty decent but the entry door was festooned with signs saying 'Absolutely no cats'.  You develop a sort of sixth sense about these things and, sure...

Last night's motel was everything that the previous one hadn't been:  modern, tastefully decorated, well run, not on fire.  As a convenience to guests there was a great big gas bbq so we hustled down to the supermarket to procure 2 steaks the size of baseball gloves and had a gourmet supper. Dinner tonight was take-away spaghetti which, because we are sophisticated, we ate sitting on the floor in our bedroom.  This created rather more mess than we anticipated. We are on day 3 and, in addition to the occasional room inferno, we are challenged by an astonishing catalogue of mechanical issues.  For some reason this seems to mostly concern broken chains.  I would say the average for a trip is fewer than one but we have already now dealt with 3.  Tomorrow we will have to go and buy more chains.....about another 20 should do it. Today we rode 80 miles to Long Beach, WA.  The weather was pretty indifferent (very overcast for much of the ...

The following is obviously true because, frankly, you couldn't make it up: Last night we dined in our room with a couple of glasses of Safeway's finest vino tinto before snuggling down for the night. 30 minutes later we were fast asleep when there was a knock on the door.  'Yes, what is it?' I shouted (while thinking 'fu#%ing customers, why won't they leave us alone?'). 'Err....my room is on fire' came the reply.  And it was.  An electrical short in the bathroom fan had set the fan unit and surrounding ceiling nicely ablaze.  While I set about tackling the fire Dom called 911.  With a combination of wet towels and rubbish bins full of water I extinguished the fire but within 3 minutes of the call we have two fire appliances and 3 police cars on the motel forecourt. The fire department checked everything was properly out while we tried calling the motel owner but, eventually, we gave up and bussed the occupant to a nearby mot...

Mericans are fat.  I am not talking about 'could lose a few pounds' or 'a bit overweight'.  I'm not even talking about porky.  I mean properly 'crane to move them into an ambulance' fat. Seattle is a town with its fair share of social problems and colossally fat people feature heavily (pun intended).   Never theless, in the photos you can see Dom modelling the elevator (that means lift for anyone who has never been to Merica or watched TV) to demonstrate its capacious nature, and a sign advising that the limit is 2 people.  You have to have seen some of the people to understand the wisdom of this limit. As we rounded up the punters we ran through our usual start of trip checklist: Customer who hasn't built their bike properly - CHECK Customer whose bike isn't mechanically up to the trip - CHECK Overweight bags - CHECK, CHECK Customers who said they would bring their bike in a  fold-flat cardboard box but actually used ...

It was an early start to get to Heathrow by train on a train strike day.  I arrived in good time, checked in early and was at the gate a full hour before departure, where I sat patiently waiting to board behind everyone whose pricier ticket or exalted status gave them priority.  Eventually the dregs were called and I presented my boarding pass to the machine which sad 'no'.  I sought assistance as instructed and was told that I had been offloaded from the flight!!! There was no clear explanation but it seems that somehow they had decided I was a no show and had removed me from the manifest.......and my bags from the hold.  I got a bit cross.  To cut a long story short there was much tapping of keyboards, muttering and sucking of teeth but eventually I was allowed to board.  Obviously, there is absolutely no connection between any of this and my 2020 victory against BA at arb itration over my flight refund!  I landed in Seatt...

Last time I posted to this blog I was sat in a hotel bedroom in Madrid with my tail between my legs; our winter Spanish getaway had been cut short by freak Arctic weather which was forecast to deliver overnight lows of -7c and we were heading home after just 5 days.  Since then there have been cycling trips but only commercial ones where I don't usually blog.  With no further 'Grumpy Old Men' trips imminent I have decided to make an exception for my next jaunt:   On Saturday I head to Merica to chaperone 17 riders 1600 miles down the Pacific Coast Highway.  I was last scheduled to lead this ride in 2020 when Covid sent everything tits up and it was, naturally, cancelled.  At that time I ended up having a massive fight with BA over my flight refund.  A long story but I eventually took them to arbitration and got my refund but I vowed never to fly with them again.  I am a man of principle so on Saturday I will be boarding a BA flight to Se...